gangsta rap: a non-violent death

for those of us who follow rap closely, and especially for all the extant hip-hop junkies of the world, it has recently come to my attention that several very subtle shifts in the subject matter of mainstream rap have culminated in a redirection of hip hop as we know it. as rappers such as lupe fiasco, kanye west, drake, and kid cudi are more and more successful, it's very interesting to see more traditional "gangsta" rappers such as t.i., lil wayne, and jay-z lean more heavily on their non-gangsta content of their lyrics. interesting. there have always been rappers, successful by other means besides counting the number of units moved, such as the roots and common who were generally very introspective and conciousin their raps, and it seems that is the direction that hip hop has taken today. historically, hip hop was very introspective and more biographical at its inception. looking back at rappers like big daddy kane, rakim, and biz markie, there wasn't the insipid attitude in rap where everyone was claiming to shoot your mother, rape your grandmother, beating "that bitch wit a bat." none of that. rap used to be conscious. one listen to grandmaster flash and the furious five's "the message", and one actually visualizes what it's like to come from the hood. imagine that.

rockin out to jay-z's the blueprint 3, helped me to come to the very apparent realization that gangsta rap is coming to a non-violent death. jay-z is more or less the head hauncho in the rap game, and he doesn't have one gangsta song on the entire album (DOA is probably the hardest song on that joint). this is an album that is brilliant by even jay-z standards. the production is tight, the lyrics are on point, and there is actually a message in most of the songs. be amazed. thinking along those same lines leads me to reflect on t.i.'s last album paper trail: not very gangsta. although, there is some g up in there, the album is very introspective and moves away from the pervasive shoot'em up motif characteristic of his previous albums.

with that being said, hopefully the current trend in hip hop will continue. it would be great to see more innovation in lyrical content and more diverse themes in rap. and don't just take my word for it, take a listen for yourself...

drinking myself obnoxious: highlights

so last night, i went out. i should preface that statement with, yesterday i took my psych shelf, and i what i originally thought would be akin to eating a stack of pancakes à la fork and knife with a nice glass of milk to wash them down, in terms of difficulty here, turned out to be a mental plundering of an orifice i would rather not directly refer to. thus, weighed down with the possibility of getting kicked out of med school for failing exams, i decided to drink myself into a state that i know quite well. it's an altered state of mind in which i have rendered myself (or have been rendered by my fine acquaintance, al) silly, obnoxious, and belligerent. fortunately, red eyed, sharp fanged monster of belligerence did not rear it's ugly head, if i may be so cliché. that does leave silly and obnoxious. honestly, though, i think i was neither more silly nor more obnoxious than i would have been completely sober. the following is more or less a breakdown of the evening.

1) pregame at doc and his wife's place (actual names are excluded for the protection of individuals' identities)
2) wine bar with the roomies (where i tried to convince one of my classmates to hookup with one of my roommates... yeah...)
3) p.t.'s (formerly known as lucy's)

pregaming at doc's is always fun. doc is one of the, if not the, funniest people i've ever met. plus, his wife is really cool. originally, they were supposed to come out with us, but as they had not seen each other for a while, i think they made alternate plans for the evening...

so the wine bar. $5 glasses of wine, and not just the cheap house wine either. i was instantaneously excited from the 1st sip of pinot noir, the closest thing to ambrosia man will ever know. still, i was not just excited because of the wine, no matter how much of an alcoholic many people believe me to be. it was the 1st time in a long time that unc som class of 2011 were getting together and enjoying each other's company. as much as that could happen. it is here where the 1st highlight of the night occurred. there's an attractive (cute face, nice body) classmate of mine who i made a particular effort to talk to, since she generally seems to be one of the more interesting persons in the class of 2011. we were making casual convo, little small-talk, when words happened to steer their way towards the subject of singledom. to my knowledge, she had been single for the duration of our studies thus far, and i inquired if she had any applicants at the moment. she replied no. now, i would be interested in hanging out with this particular classmate, in a more intimate setting, mainly because i had never really sat down and talked with her. as such, i informed her of my interest, invited her to brunch, all in a calm nice-guy type demeanor and vernacular. and what does she do but shut me down with an inglorious rant about how the venue i suggested was horrible. i just walked away, thinking, "no wonder she's still single..." i wasn't really suggesting that she and i date, though that's what she thought. quite frankly, she doesn't quite meet my standards. is it obnoxious that i think that? probably. but hey, that's how i roll. what get's me is that, being polite just doesn't work on women in this world, and that's why "nice guys finish last" (www.laddertheory.com). just to prove my point i went up to two other women, no polite introductions, just minimal convo to gain slight interest and intrusive suggestions that we exchange numbers, and of course, we exchanged numbers. though, i must add that i am a bit charming...

on to p.t.'s. this half of the night was probably the "silly" part. i, in my desperation to close out the night with a great moment in hookup history, tried to take home a porker. preface: i was actually going after the friend, but the original target transferred my aim to her friend (i.e. "the porker"). it was a move commonly known as "game reversal" where one intends to run game on a particular target, but target uses itself as a decoy, transfers the roles, and reverses the direction of the game (i didn't escape the trick... silly). well played, ladies... well played. it was late, and in my mind, i was like "fuck it." it's this particular roll with the punches attitude that exhibits the 2nd highlight of the night. there's a certain threshold of attractiveness over which a guy will have sex with a girl and under which he will not. this line of thought is contiguous with the 2-point (trinary for all you sluts of logic) system. a 0 point girl is one a guy won't do under any circumstances. he could be drunk, high, and a paranoid schizophrenic, still he would refuse to poke. a 1 point girl is one that a guy would readily hookup with but would not admit it to anyone, save maybe his best friend or the dog that he has had for 10 years. 1's are the girls drunken hookup stories are made of. a 2 point girl is one who a guy would bag and pridefully boast about it. it's all about discrimination. alcohol decreases one's capacity to discriminate between 1's and 2's on a conscious level, and so many a 1 are taken home, had fun with, and never spoken to or of again. clearly, the girl from last night was a 1. for reasons beyond my current understanding, i stopped drinking early. ironic, i know, but fate smiled upon me and allowed me to escape the dejection of the 1 morning after...

at the prompting of tunya

so my dear cousin (whom i love very much, by the way) responded to my jocular facebook status "planning on that reup 2nite. not them o's but them hos..." with "Rod, I really don't find this funny. Offensive language is never funny. Some words have double meanings, take for example 'nigga'. It can be used offensively or used by guys to me, 'my boy'. While I'm not advocating the use of the word, I do understand it has a positive connotation. There is no positive meaning for the word 'ho' - derived from the noun 'whore' - anywhere. I still love and respect you, cuz. And, this is a personal perspective. But use of that word has implications for the world's view of women that extend beyond me. With baby girls being murdered at birth at alarming rates in China, and girls being taken in to brothels at as young as 5 years old in south east Asia, I hope that you will reconsider the use and spread of this terminology for women. Even prostitutes should not be called 'ho'." while i don't categorically disagree with her perspective, there are several flaws in the logic of such a statement.

article 1. of course offensive language is funny. it's a scientific fact that if eddie murphy hadn't had his stellar performance in raw, and even subsequently in delirious, standup comedy of today would be quite remiss. eddie murphy has influenced such comedians as chris rock, martin lawrence, dave chappelle, george lopez, and russel peters. eddie murphy himself was influenced by the legends richard pryor and redd foxx, both of whom used notoriously offensive language.

article 2. while it is indeed true that some words have double meanings, many of us have come to accept the word "nigga" (the bigup) as a distinct entity from the word "nigger" (the slur). though phonetically distinct, the two are etymologically equal. "ho" on the other hand has one and only one meaning. ho refers to a morally lax, promiscuous person. it is not an equivocation. there is no double-entendre. there is no mistaking the intent of this word. a whore, however, is a woman who accepts money for sexual favors. whore is also synonymous with prostitute, and in this my cousin is absolutely correct. a prostitute should not be called a ho. now whether or not a ho wants to accept money for her part in partaking of decadence... that's another story altogether.

article 3. female infants being murdered in china (presumably by their parents) goes way beyond the mere use of the term ho. way beyond. so does institution of child sex slavery in SE asia. yes both the murdering of babies in china and forcing children into sex slavery portray the underlying malicious misogyny of society, but their connection with my use of the word ho is quite intangible.

that being said, irreverent comedy is some of the best comedy there is, hands down, and while there remain comedians out there who incorporate offensive language, including but not exclusive to the word "ho", into their routines, i will remain there to laugh. furthermore, by the inherent nature of a ho, the word can not be uttered without its attachment of such a negative connotation, but the word only refers to a person's loose morals and promiscuity, not to the sex of the person.

what'sup buddy?

yeah. one of weirdest encounters tonight. i was out picking up my pizza, walking out of papa john's full of the excitement that i'm exploding with when i know i'm about to crush some papa john's. out of nowhere, a 5'1" extremely drunken woman walks up to me and say's, "you got some money?" as we walk past each other.
so i respond, "nah. i left all my change at home..."
she looks back and says, "oh. nah. i said, 'what'sup, buddy'."
i think to myself, "sure. and i'm the pope's illegitimate sun." although, there's no proof to the contrary, but that's another matter altogether.
then, as i'm walking off, she cries out, "hey, hey! wait a minute," as she's holding her hand out for dap, i turn around, and we approach each other. dap. then she looks down at my arms (exposed because of my wearing the wife-beat). "damn. you play football. don't you?" (rhetorical question).
as i'm responding with a negative, she leans in a lays her head on my chest... ?!?

a little bit of cleavage goes a long way...

i've been meaning to write this post for the past couple of weeks now, so it's likely that i've forgotten half of what i want to say, but anyhows... let me address women showing titties while at work. it's a touchy subject, simply for the fact that as a man, when i see non-concealed cleavage, it just makes me think of all the fun activities i like to engage in with breasts (of the fairer sex)... but that's a whole other story altogether, although not completely. it's because of these thoughts i wonder about cleavage when i need not to be wondering about cleavage. hmmm. "why," i know you're wondering, "do i think about breasts when i'm not supposed to?" it's because they're out when i'm at work. aha, so i finally get to the point. there are lace linings of cleavages, plunging necklines, and sometimes even a sexy shadow or two, hinting of wanton areolas. i certainly don't walk around the office with half my chest exposed, and it's generally more socially acceptable for a man to show his chest than a woman. then why is it that women feel particularly obligated to walk around, as if pronouncing the grand exhibition of their decolletage? it's distracting, it's immodest, and it's unprofessional. so this goes out to all the eve's out there, teasing the adams of the work place: ladies, stop showing your titties at work.

not diverse enough

as many of you know, i'm doing my first rotation (family medicine) in burnsville, nc. it's a tiny town of about 1600 residents, quaint and comfortable. the surroundings are beautiful if not wondrous, being in the mountains and all. i meet a lot of people everyday, working at a family practice, and inevitably some of those people ask me, "are you going to come back here and practice?" now, i have a very short response in my mind, which i'll get to, but what generally comes out of my mouth is this, "[laugh] i don't know where i'll end up..." following with my remarking how i'm in the army and how i have military obligations and such. however, what really goes through my mind is, "there are way too many white people here..."

that thought makes me think now, has made me think for a while. it's the same reason, i would never go back and live in iowa, the same reason i think that i wouldn't live any where else where there wasn't an acceptable percentage of people of color. diversity. it's a word i use more when speaking to the locals in this area, particularly when i'm in asheville, when people ask me how i like the area. i tell them fine, but it's not diverse enough. so i'm wondering now, is that statement the same as saying, "there are too many white people." it also makes me wonder how would i feel, if i were white and someone told me where i lived wasn't diverse enough. being the more global-minded person that i am, i expect that i would understand where said person was coming from, that i would be perceptive of my surroundings. along the same lines, i don't ever recall having asked a white person would they live somewhere with the relevant response being, "there are too many black people." interestingly enough, it can be argued that saying "there are too many asians" or "latinos" or "blacks" are all different notions, based on the differences in culture and differences in the perceptions of the respective minority groups. still, the underlying idea is the same.

race is still a touchy topic for most people, and no matter how much i believe myself to have grown as a person, i still have my reservations about white vs color. i still feel more comfortable around people of color, and most comfortable around black people. this is despite the fact that i spent three years in iowa (3% black), going to iowa state university (6% black); despite the fact that i spent a year in switzerland with the only black people being africans who don't really consider themselves black (as we do in america, but that's another subject altogether). a lot of it has to do with growing up in a town where black children get called niggers (an insult meant to inferioritize the target) in school by the white children, where such name-calling is more or less condoned by the teachers. a town where black kids have gone on camping trips with their white friends and have "mysteriously" drowned. a town where even today black voters are turned back from the polls and told they have to go through incomprehensible procedures in order to place their ballots.

i think it's the knowledge of the aforementioned events and experiences that renders me unsettled, regardless of reality. there are many individual white people that i love. there are a couple of white families that i love like my own. i never judge and individual before i meet one, but nevertheless, the large group dynamic does anything but allow me a comfortable mind state. i would hate to think that makes me a racist, but i doubt i'll be able to outgrow the discomfort. so, i would not live here in bursnville, or asheville, and i wouldn't live in iowa, simply because it's not diverse enough...

everything short of wearing hoods and yelling "white power!"

check out this article:
http://www.heraldnet.com/article/20090614/NEWS01/706149860&news01ad=1

it's about the only article i could find on the matter of the minutemen project's massacre (incomplete) of the flores family. the mother survived the attack, and the older daughter was not home when the incident occurred. it's very surprising that there are not too many articles i could find, covering the subject. i had to go through someone else's blog to find one. also of significant remarkability is the fact that the minutemen are considered an activist group. that, to me, is completely preposterous. i ask myself, "do activists rob people at gunpoint?" "do activists break into people's homes and murder them?" i can't say that i can think of any activist group that does. i could think of an "activist group" that preys upon and terrorizes minorities (or at least they used to, now i think they just smuggle drugs and have town hall meetings to stir up anti-minority sentiment). the group of which i speak wears hoods, has leaders called grand dragons, and yells "white power!" a lot, but if i'm not mistaken, this group isn't really an activist group...